All of us are experiencing loss in one way or another right now. But, for some, that loss has a name and a face and held a place in our life. It’s never easy to lose someone close to us, but the added challenge of social distancing and isolation can make it even harder.
Grieving is a normal part of life. There’s no right or wrong way to experience grief. But it’s important to engage in the process:
1. Reach out to others in your life for support
You need be with people so they can comfort you and engage in the rituals that help you cope with grief and loss. That is what friends and family are for – to help each other through the tough times. It’s more complicated now, but don’t isolate yourself.
2. Grief, by nature, needs to be expressed
Only through grief are you able to properly work through the loss and allow yourself to heal. Telling your story helps externalize your pain and gives you some space.
3. Grief requires space in your day to process
Give yourself permission to experience your grief by making space in your day for “Grief Time.” Remember, grieving is natural, and it’s important to give yourself time and space for it. There are no rules as to how you use this time.
4. Write letters to your loved one
Many people find writing letters to their loved one helps them to work through their grief. Writing down your thoughts helps to externalize your grief and maintain a connection to your loved one.
5. Build a new social support network and support system
You may need to force yourself to build new social networks and support systems right now. You have to find the strength and courage to try to replace some of what you have lost by doing something new.
6. Accept that a change has occurred in your life
The reality is that death brings about loss of more than just the person. Your loved one likely held multiple roles that were important to you. It’s important to identify what was lost, as it will help you understand why grief is so complex and you cannot just “get over it.” While you may not be able to replace everything that was lost from this person’s passing, you can use this exercise to help identify where you need support and that will help you to begin to control your grief.
If you’re supporting someone who is grieving a loss, be present with them in their grief; give them space to grieve and tell their story. Do something constructive, like make them a meal or go grocery shopping for them. Be with them as they transition into their “new” normal.
