Validate, validate, validate.
There’s a tendency to want to “fix” things for our teenager or make them feel shame or guilt for being upset about the losses they’re experiencing right now.
Many teenagers are facing missed proms, graduations, sweet 16’s, cancelled sports seasons, and so much more.
And, it sucks – it’s OK to tell them that. After so much anticipation and preparation, it sucks that they aren’t getting to follow through. Their reaction is totally normal.
They don’t need you to fix this for them and they don’t need you to tell them to focus on what they still have during this time.
In their world, these are significant losses and they may be experiencing disenfranchised grief – the feeling of grief that’s not validated. An event like prom, for example, is something many teenagers have grown up imagining and looking forward to. They need time to grieve the loss of these significant events.
So, empathize with them. Validate those losses. You can’t fix their world, but you can acknowledge that those losses are real.
